Listen on Your Favorite App
Why Becoming a Team Takes Time... and That’s Okay
May 11, 2021
00:00
19:10
Listen on Your Favorite App
From its inconceivable R.O.U.Ses to its iconic lines, the 1987 film The Princess Bride is a favorite at our house. For us, one of the most memorable characters is Inigo Montoya. His patience and persistence as he hunts for the six-fingered man remind us that it takes time to execute a “death wish.” But what does a “death wish” have to do with marriage?
While we joined a new team when we promised, “I do,” that doesn’t mean the unity and cooperation we talked about in episode 1 are going to be easy or automatic. It takes time after we get married to make that transition from “me” to “us.”
One reason is that all of us come to marriage with ingrained habits. These are the things that steal joy from our relationship, keep us from walking in unity and practicing cooperation, and can even weaken our resolve to stay committed. Listen in as we share three practical ways you can practice patience for the old as you and your spouse work together toward the new.
3 Ways to Practice Patience, Persistence, and Grace:
1. Pick your battles (recognize the difference between our spouse sinning and our spouse just annoying us).
2. Make a Communication Sandwich
3. Focus on progress, not perfection
Us Time Challenge:
Take some time to make a list of a few ways you’ve noticed that the other has made progress in an area. Figure out a fun and creative way to affirm each other for their growth.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
The Princess Bride
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
While we joined a new team when we promised, “I do,” that doesn’t mean the unity and cooperation we talked about in episode 1 are going to be easy or automatic. It takes time after we get married to make that transition from “me” to “us.”
One reason is that all of us come to marriage with ingrained habits. These are the things that steal joy from our relationship, keep us from walking in unity and practicing cooperation, and can even weaken our resolve to stay committed. Listen in as we share three practical ways you can practice patience for the old as you and your spouse work together toward the new.
3 Ways to Practice Patience, Persistence, and Grace:
1. Pick your battles (recognize the difference between our spouse sinning and our spouse just annoying us).
2. Make a Communication Sandwich
3. Focus on progress, not perfection
Us Time Challenge:
Take some time to make a list of a few ways you’ve noticed that the other has made progress in an area. Figure out a fun and creative way to affirm each other for their growth.
Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide
Links Mentioned in This Episode:
The Princess Bride
Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Meet Your Host
Ted and Ashleigh first met in Chesapeake, Virginia in 2001. In December 2002, they said, “I do, of course!” Since then, they’ve lived in five more states and celebrated the births of four daughters. Both have master’s degrees in Communication from Regent University, and over the years they’ve served as premarital mentors for engaged couples.
Ted’s a website developer, and Ashleigh is the author of the books Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment and Cooperation in Marriageand Braving Sorrow Together: The Transformative Power of Faith and Community When Life Is Hard.
Ashleigh has also written for publications including iBelieve.com, Focus on the Family Magazine, Boundless.org, and HuffPost.
Learn more at AshleighSlater.com.
Ted’s a website developer, and Ashleigh is the author of the books Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment and Cooperation in Marriageand Braving Sorrow Together: The Transformative Power of Faith and Community When Life Is Hard.
Ashleigh has also written for publications including iBelieve.com, Focus on the Family Magazine, Boundless.org, and HuffPost.
Learn more at AshleighSlater.com.
