Unhurried Living | Helping Christians Rest Deeper & Lead Better

In the early part of my life I'd like to think that I was a relatively functional and intelligent participant in my own life. And I was. I got married, I held down a job, and we began a family. I enjoyed a large community and a wonderful life. However, under the surface, I didn't really have access to my own, individual voice. There was a kind of holy confidence missing. Self-doubt and anxiety often ruled the day. And I knew little of boundaries.I now enjoy a major shift of focus. I know who I am in God and a holy confidence has emerged. I feel more solid inside because I stand more firmly on who God says I am. My confidence comes from him. This holy confidence feels like being in flow most of the time.Sure, I still struggle just like all of us do in day-to-day ways. However, in a central place inside myself I stand in this holy confidence. And I move forward in flow. There is obviously more to the story here. How did I get from there to here? Well, I unpack all of this more in today’s episode. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more on the Unhurried Living websiteLearn about and pre-order her new book, Hold That Thought: Sorting Through the Voices in Our Heads Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Today we are talking about thoughts. We begin with  "You are not your thoughts. You have thoughts."   The first time I heard this I, of course, understood every single word. And yet it seemed like a foreign concept to me. What do you mean I'm not my thoughts? They're in my head, it's my voice, of course it's me! Another way of saying this is: You are more than your thoughts. You have thoughts. But you are not your thoughts. This is such a freeing insight. Because it means you have the choice to move toward objectivity when you notice certain thoughts floating through your brain. Especially the unhelpful ones. Please tell me I'm not the only one that has unhelpful thoughts. Anxiety-producing, control-enacting, fear-inducing, judgment-oriented thoughts. These are not my best move, but isn’t it easy to slide into these dynamics? Once I understood that I was not my thoughts and that I have thoughts, I realized I was able to make a choice. But this is harder than it looks. Sure, I could make a choice, but there are many steps between where I am now and a whole new way of behaving. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Picture this...you are at the gym and you’re getting ready to lift some weights. It’s been a while, but you’ve decided to go for it. The barbell is in your hands and you are prepared to lift it up over your head.But before you do so, a guy walks over to you and says, “I bet you can lift more than that. Here, let me help you.” You protest, but he insists and then he proceeds to add 20 more pounds to each side. And then he just walks away, no cheering you on, and no coaching.You try to lift the barbell but it won’t budge. What you thought was going to be a profitable time of exercise just turned into a dead-weight hit and run that stalls your workout.The dynamic of control is like those extra 40 pounds--extra, unnecessary weight. Control can take an otherwise regular situation and turn it into an un-liftable challenge.And the irony is that we are that guy who added the extra weight. We do it to ourselves!Bearing up under the weight of control takes its toll. We find we are unable to keep going while carrying the world on our shoulders. Much of the stress in our lives is caused by expectations, as well as trying to control situations so they turn out the way we think they should.What would it look like to give up control? Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

We are living at a time when rampant contempt and disregard for humanity fill our daily newsfeeds. This is not limited to North America or Western culture; it’s occurring worldwide. We don’t even hear all of the terrible things that are happening, but what we do hear is now beyond unbearable. Like so many others who are speaking out about this problem, I don’t have easy answers. So, from my heart, I am asking that we continue to be people of blessing. We can be present in our own very real lives. Day by day. Moment by moment. We can bridle our own tongue, monitor our own anger, and guard our own heart. And we can will the good of another—one person at a time.Dallas Willard has said that a “blessing is the projection of good into the life of another. It isn’t merely words. It is the actual putting forth of your will for the good of another person. It always involves God. Only God is capable of bringing good to another. We naturally say, ‘God bless you,’ and that’s right. You bless someone when you will their good by invoking God on their behalf. This is the nature of blessing. God wants us to receive blessing from Him and extend it to others.”Right now, recall and savor one way God has blessed you.Out of gratitude for that blessing, what might it look like for you to put forth your will for the good of another person today? God is present. He loves you. Let that overflow, and be a blessing. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

If you are in the middle of a season of change, you likely feel out of place, neither here nor there. You feel the need for some fresh air, some energy to keep going. If you are at the end of a season of change, you may be tired. You desire to celebrate, but you can’t keep your eyes open. Plus, the next project is looming before you and you don’t know if you have time to celebrate. Here is a passage on which you can hang your hat no matter what stage of your process you are in. It’s from Isaiah 26:7-9, The Message… The path of right-living people is level.    The Leveler evens the road for the right-living.We’re in no hurry, God. We’re content to linger    in the path sign-posted with your decisions.Who you are and what you’ve done    are all we’ll ever want.Through the night my soul longs for you.    Deep from within me my spirit reaches out to you.When your decisions are on public display,    everyone learns how to live right.  Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Over the years, as I engaged in various forms of group exercise, I’ve collected some helpful tips from many fitness instructors. I’ve been able to narrow some of these ideas into an acronym that may help you formationally.Many of the same principles that grow us physically can also be translated into our formational inner work. So let’s take a look at ARC: Ability, Rhythm and Core.ABILITY - Start where you are.RHYTHM - Engage healthy rhythms.CORE - Let your believing  become knowing  through practice. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

"How are you suffering?"  Doesn’t this sound like a fun episode? However, it won’t take long to realize, and agree, there has been a lot of suffering in the last few years. A global pandemic. I’ve lost two friends to it, and I’m pretty sure I’ve lost two months of my life fighting COVID19 two different times. There’s been so much pain. Social conflict. Political polarization. Racial pain. Vocational isolation or overwhelm. This episode addresses these truths  in a conversation I have with friends on the topic of pain.  The discussion draws from the chapter in my book, What Does Your Soul Love?, of the same title and looks at "how are we suffering?"In my book, An Unhurried Life, I put two chapters back to back that I wish didn’t go together like they do. One is titled “Suffering: Unexpected Unhurrying,” and the other is “Maturity: Growing Up Takes Time.” I wish that hardship and spiritual growth didn’t go together so often, but the seasons that have contributed the most to deepening my roots or strengthening my trust have been hard ones. So I hope this episode will help you envision how some of the hard places you’ve been walking just might be something God uses for your best good and the good of those around you. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

"So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t." (Romans 12:5, MSG)⁠⁠"Love one another from the center of who you are…" (Romans 12:9, MSG)⁠⁠I now often use these verses as I prepare I speak to a group. I remind myself to embrace and to be who I am, without qualification. ⁠⁠I get to be exactly who I was made to be. ⁠⁠And I remember that I get to love those in front of me from the center of who I am. What a treat. What a privilege! And, to borrow a phrase, I can do that!⁠⁠This is an Unhurried Living way of serving. I serve from my authentic self and I love from the center of that place. ⁠⁠So much freer than trying to pretend I am something I am not and trying to impress those I am teaching.⁠⁠I prefer authenticity and love over pretending and impressing.⁠⁠If you are suffering from situational anxiety today, remind yourself that you are loved, that you get to be exactly who you are, and that you can love from the center of your deepest place. ⁠ Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website.⁠You, too, do not have to pretend or impress. You can give your best and leave the outcomes to God. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

In our book, What Does Your Soul Love?, I shared the story of how I was learning photography at the same time as I was in the midst of a dark night of the soul. At the time, and to this day, I carry within me the principles and metaphors of photography as a paradigm for my life. There are many connections here between photography, presence and perspective. I’d like to share three with you now. 1. Look for the light.2. Remember the rule of three.3. Choose where to focus.Listen to today's I Can Do That Podcast as I unpack all three of these dynamics. Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

I’ve been a spiritual director and coach for many women over many years. There are common themes that have arisen in that time. ⁠⁠One prevalent theme I bump into over and over is this: Women tend to think there is something wrong with them if they are not progressing quickly through their current situation. ⁠⁠Whether it’s a difficult work situation, a troubled relational issue, a period of extended grief, or any formational dynamic, most are convinced that quickly is the only reasonable and truly healthy way forward. This is usually an unconscious bias that goes unnoticed until you say some things out loud and look at them a little closer.⁠⁠What’s the rush? Let go of the need to get over it and to continue a production-line mentality. This takes courage and hope, but in the long run you will have participated in your own transformational process. ⁠⁠You are being shaped more and more into the image of Christ. How long might that take? Breathe. Feel. Cooperate with the invitations set before you. It’s counter cultural, but this isn’t a race and no one is grading you.⁠⁠Allow yourself the gift of grace. Grace of pacing. Grace of process. Grace of permission.⁠⁠Connect with Gem on Instagram and learn more about her and her programs at Unhurried Living website. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.